Saturday, December 25, 2010

Christmas- the long post

I've heard many people say that they don't do the Christmas Tree thing because Christmas is about Jesus. With all the commercialization of Christmas, and gifts and sales Jesus doesn't seem to get any glory- with the exception of a Cantata here or a pageant there. So they would rather not get hyped up about a tree at all.

Even in the craziness in the season, I see God all around us. The legend of the candy cane says that candy canes are in the shape of a J for Jesus, they are white to represent His purity, and have red stripes to represent the blood he shed for our sins. That makes sense to me. When one of my kids asked why Santa wore Red and White, I told them the obvious, the red in the suit reminds Santa, and us, of Jesus' blood, and the white reminds us of his purity and righteousness. (Historically his suit has something to do with an ad campaign for a popular soda company and in my opinion its the best color combination that points to Jesus). Gift giving points to Jesus too . God gave us his greatest gift of all, His son, wise men gave gifts to Jesus and we give gifts to each other. We are more compassionate this time of year, that points to Jesus. The bright lights remind me of the star of Bethlehem.. that points to Jesus, right?

When I look at the sparkling lights on my tree, I think of how Jesus is the light. I think about how He died on a tree. I think about how he longs to give the gifts to His children. I think about how so many turn down his gift of salvation.

Each year we hang up a stocking for Jesus. This year Rocco asked, "why is it so small?" and agreed that we should get Him a bigger one. But what does one give Jesus as we celebrate his birth? The first year I hung Jesus' stocking, I put in prayer requests. Last year, I put in nothing, this year I put in nothing.

I realized over the last couple of years, the only thing Jesus wants is me. He not only wants me but, he wants me to trust Him with everything I hold dear, every thing that gives me joy, every thing that annoys me, everything that makes me crazy. His word says, in 1Peter 5:7, "cast all your cares upon him for he cares for you". All means all . All the good, all the bad, and all the ugly. All the big things and little things that concern us, he wants us to turn it over to Him and trust that he will work things out and give us the wisdom on what to do, what to say, and when to say it. You see, there is something about the sovereignty of God that allows Him to know exactly what to do with the "all" we give Him. But it is up to us to trust him. To trust him enough to ask him to live in our hearts and be our Savior. To ask him in our hearts and ask him to cover our sins with the blood that he shed on Calvary. Trust is not an easy thing especially if we have been hurt. But, Father God is not an earthly father, He is waiting for you with His arms wide open. Just waiting for you to say, "come into my heart" . He is the creator of the universe, He knows what He is doing. He cares so deeply for us we can't even comprehend it. He loves us so deeply, He sent His son to pay for our sins, so we wouldn't have to spend this life and eternity without Him. So as hard as it is to go out on a limb and trust some one who is bigger than life, and who most likely has been misrepresented to you by well meaning people, taking a leap of faith means believing that this God, knows what is best for you and only intends the best for you. We try so many things in life to fill the void that only God can fill. Since we've tried everything, why can't we try him? If you haven't done so today, why don't you let Him in?

Monday, November 29, 2010

Baby Love

In the midst of getting ready for all the holiday cheer, I sat down to eat. Dolly came over to me and I was certain she was going to ask me for something on my plate. I looked at her and she touched my face and began tracing it with her little fingers. She then said, "I'm falling in love with you". How precious is that ?

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

My Thankful List 2010

It's that time of year again when I compile my Thankful List. I am thankful to God for so many things. The list below is not necessary in order of importance.

I am Thankful for

  • My Ipod
  • I Tunes
  • Decaf Mocha Lattes after a hard day at work
  • My Zojiruishi Bread Machine- Need I say more?
  • My Beloved Crock Pot
  • My Freedom to brainwash/home educate my kids
  • My Lake
  • My Hammock
  • My Piano
  • My Kids who make me laugh, cry, and Pray
  • My husband
  • Mom mobile a.k.a Mini van, which has seen me through many miles on the Eastern Seaboard
  • Altoids- of which I was formally addicted and still going through withdrawal
  • my glue gun
  • Rainy days where I can stay in
  • Folk Music
  • Arts & Craft shows
  • My mother- who can say enough about an amazing mother?
  • God-who is faithful and patient in every growth process I am in, Who provides in the 11th hour and consequently stretches my faith and causes me to trust Him more
  • My Cameras. Both Digital and SLR (Can cameras be considered analog?) They both tell stories I can never put into words
  • The Beach
  • Parks

Monday, November 22, 2010

Across the miles PT 2

Okay. So last week from Sunday to Sunday, my count was, (Drum Roll Please!) 282.3 miles! Can you believe it? So in total I have driven over 800 miles in the last 22 days! That's on average a little over 36 miles a day. I decided that it would probably make sense for me to keep extra water, snacks, & reading material, in the van since I'm spending a huge chunk of time there. Maybe I should bring some mending along. I managed to clean it out on Saturday, -even did the windows! Van cleaning has been on the schedule for 3 years but, if I miss van cleaning day, without fail, my van turns into a big purse on wheels.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Across the miles

Out of curiosity I set the odometer to clock how many miles I drive in a given week. Much to my surprise the distance I drove was equivalent to a 4 hour trip.

The first week of November I drove 381 miles! Yes you read correctly 381 ! That includes 1 meeting, 1 soccer practice, 1 trip to the grocery store, 1 birthday party, 3 choral rehearsals, 2 choral concerts, 2 round trips to co-op and back home again, a couple trips to the gas station and not one trip to the Y! All totaling 381 miles of me in the car with the kids.

The second week of November, I said to myself, "Oh lets just clock it again". Although less miles this time, nevertheless close to 200 miles!

Now week three, on yesterday the 15th I reset the trip odometer again and am eager to report my findings.... All I can say right now is that something is wrong with this picture.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Salt Galore!

I can't believe its been 12 days since my last post. I have to get cooking with my digital camera so I can upload photos to this venue!

Thursday proved to be one of the most funniest cooking adventures of 2010. We decided to make waffles on a tight time crunch and I enlisted Cookies help. I told her to mix the dry ingredients and I then poured the wet ingredients in. I heard Cookie and Dolly say, "That's yucky, It taste like salt!!!" To make a long story short Cookie put 1/4 cup of salt into the mix instead of 1/4 teaspoon. Go Figure... I couldn't help but laugh. We ended up ditching the batter and having Chicken and salad for Dinner. In light of this dinner fiasco, we decided that we could probably do without salt for the next several months.

Monday, October 11, 2010

The Ice cream Man

I was in Noahkeem & Rocco's room this afternoon when I heard a familiar melodic tune coming down the street. It was the tune of the Ice cream Man; That little music box sound just seems to entice all little kids outside or at least to the window. As he slowly glided down the cul-de-sac in his bright yellow ice cream mobile, blasting his theme song, I glanced at him hovering over the steering wheel. He was on the look out for his little customers. Noahkeem yelled out of his bedroom window, "No thanks, I have my own icecream today!!!!" Just then something in my brain clicked and I realized, ever since I was a little girl, I never trusted the icecream man. The same questions I had back then about him, I still have today. Why is it I always feel that the Ice cream man never gives back the right amount of change? Why is it that it seems like he jacks his prices up on the "good ice cream" treats every summer and leaves the busted down supermarket ice pops at $.50 or $1.00? (The one's no one wants). How does he remember all the prices for all the treats if all the prices are listed on the outside of the truck next to their faded pictures? And could somebody tell me what the Ice Cream Man does all winter while he is waiting for summer to roll around? Maybe I should ask him the next time I see him and make sure I have exact change when I do.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

The Regular Mom

I had Rocco come inside today after setting my car alarm off- on purpose. He apologized moments later and asked for forgiveness. (Of course I forgave him). In between all that, I had a phone call and I took it upstairs. When I returned back down, and walked into the kitchen I felt a wet little puddle of fruit punch under my feet. Dolly had no problem blowing the whistle and telling me Rocco did it.

I called him in from riding his brothers bike (which he is not allowed to do) and asked him to clean up the spill. After cleaning Rocco said, "I wish you were a the regular Mom". "The regular Mom? When  was I the regular Mom?" He then said, "When you were 33" followed by "You were nice then". I had to remind him that he was only 3 when I was 33. How could he remember when I was 33? The clinker was, "you're mean and boring". Thankfully, my skin is tough after being a mom for 10 years not to mention I majored in Psychology and have a Life Coach certification. With all of this experience I was able to translate the situation into more understanding terms in which I then was able to move on with the rest of my day. What Rocco could not verbalize was, "Mom, why can't I just ride my brothers bike even though you and Dad have asked me not to? Mom, isn't it okay that I pour a 1 1/2 gallon jug of fruit punch myself when your not looking? Are you serious that you expect me to come back inside and at 7 years old expect me to wipe up the fruit punch that I spilled? And missed out on this sunny day (even though I've been outside for the last 4 hours)? And to all of that I say yes my little one, this part of the home school curriculum is called training and development; housekeeping. I am training you to take responsibility for your actions including spills and relying on the fact that you will develop into a young man who will take responsibility for choices and actions-including spills. If I clean up the things that I know that you are capable of doing in a satisfactory manner, I would be robbing you of this wonderful exercise in housekeeping. What a wonderful boy you are! What a wonderful blessing you are to our family that you cleaned up the spill so that no one would slip and fall or worse, ants would come for a sticky wet treat. Thanks for taking care of that son! I am most certain after a couple of these incidents and exercises on how to respond, you wont have to be called in to clean up your mess and you won't even consider setting off the car alarm. Now all those things you said about Momma, I know that deep down inside you just want to do your own thing and instead of saying that it came out as, "You're mean and boring, why can't you be the regular mom". I can only say, I will probably always be The Irregular Mom. But one day your wife will thank me for it.

Friday, October 8, 2010

Stress beyond belief!

There I said it.. I'm stressing big time! I refuse to be labeled as perfect christian homeschool mom who has it all together. If it seems as though I do, it is an illusion. You cant judge a person by a glimpse you see on Sunday morning at church or on a 2 hour social outing. Or you can judge and compare and feel that you don't measure up. With life comes stress whether you have one child or 10. Unfortunately we live in an isolated society where family and friends compete against one another rather than reach out to one another. (This is where girlfriendsand bffs prove valuable!). I am so not, the perfect mother but, I will say I am not a worry wort and that I trust Jesus with a lot so things that typically would produce a freak out moment, do not. (And for that I have to give Jesus all the credit).

I have great kids but, it is a huge job training, correcting, guiding, building, and encouraging. It is a HUGE JOB. Some days that job starts earlier than others and I'm not down with that program. Several years ago "someone" made an insensitive comment to Big D while we and our children were out to dinner. The restaurant we were at had some wiggle room so the kids could flip around a little bit without management giving us the evil eye. So our "guest" said, after Big D was trying to wrangle the troops, "Your actions have consequences". If I weren't the conservative, person that I am I would have reached over the table and well.... use your imagination. "Your actions have consequences". What a nice thing to say to someone who was trying to be insure that their kids weren't disturbing others and that they were safe at the same time. Yet the comment opened my eyes how certain people feel about families with 4 or more. The bottom line is is that if your child fights, cries, whines, gets out of control, throws a tantrum or anything of the like- it is your fault because your unbridled sexual practices has caused you to have this brood of children that you cant control.- Good luck by the way, hope you can see that your actions have consequences.

Angry? Annoyed? You bet. All I have to say to that is, when things don't go your way, is it fair to say that -"your actions have consequences?" If your checkbook won't reconcile, you get into a car accident, you can't make a relationship work, is it fair to say that you should've been more wise with your money, you should have been more careful when driving or perhaps taken a different street, or you should have reached out more and that relationship would have worked and because you did none of these things- your actions have consequences? Let's get real! Life happens and it is full of difficulty-period. Here are a few basic things that my mother taught me that mean more to me today than they did 30+ years ago.

-If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.
-Be careful how you treat people, you never know when you might need them someday.
- Treat others the way you want to be treated.

That being said, if you feel compelled to be helpful to someone who is struggling with their newborn or preschoolers or teenagers-be helpful. If you are compelled to comment about how its better them and not you, think twice. Although you might not be in the same position as they are, would it be comforting to you during you difficult "life" moment for it to be said, "Better you than me?" I think not.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010


Tuesdays are by far the busiest "home"school day we have.. Cookie goes to lunch, Chapel, Musical Theatre, Bible Club, and Piano. When that is over I zoom to pick her up and have a 2 hour window then I drop her off to chorus for 2 hours. By the time we get back home it's between 8:30 or 9:00 at night. While she is out Rocco, Noahkeem & Dolly do math, grammar reading and laundry.

Noahkeem thought that doing laundry and housework wasn't "school". That made me laugh. I explained to him that " most 5 year old boys have no clue what it means to sort laundry, wash it, dry it, fold it nicely and put it away. They have no clue what it means to dust a shelf, sweep a floor and snuggle with Mom while she reads Charlotte's Web in the middle of the afternoon. He on the other hand is being equipped with all these skills and in the long run will be a better man. So it is school Noahkeem, it's called Home Economics and Relationships 101.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Slice and bake

There is just something yummy about slice and bake cookies. But also something mysterious. It never fails. I will by one role with the goal of getting 4 dozen out of it. Which isn't very hard. I just use one scoop per cookie ( a small cereal spoon size). I made 2 dozen little chocolate chip cookies in the last 24 hours. One batch for coffee and girl time, I had with a neighbor, the other batch for a Life group I've been going to. Today I open the freezer and what do I see but an unrecognizable amount of cookie dough. I know what happened and I know exactly how it disappeared but, I didn't have a freak out moment, I just realized that there is someone in the house that loves the slice more than the bake. I'm okay with that.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Really God?

Yesterday was hairy. But as the day came to a close and it was time to go out to celebrate my 13th wedding anniversary, things smoothed themselves out. Big D and I went to a little spot in Towne Center and the kiddos swam in the heated pool at the Cosmo -supervised of course.

Yet, in the midst of the "crazy" though, I was sitting at my computer- trying to do "work" and I overheard Rocco "teaching" the 2 little ones. I heard him say, "Cast all your cares on God"... It was sooo timely. And that's exactly what I needed to hear at that exact moment. Isn't it amazing how God speaks to us in that gentle, still , small voice? Isn't it interesting how we are soo busy at times and sooo revved up that we say we can't hear him or that he doesn't speak to us?

What is He saying to you today?

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Make Over

I finally saw a bathroom that I fell in love with and have been stalking the site for days now just to find out today that they took it down/or can not be found over at Rate My Space. So annoying! But, I have a plan.. I know what paints and supplies I need and I'm putting it all in my idea note book and that will be Big D's anniversary gift to me. On Monday we will be officially married for 13 years. I'll blog more about anniversaries later.

A few things I learned in Homeschool this week are:

-Even blue magnet/blue ribbon public schools are not free from the liberal agenda. There is not enough room to list the stories I heard this week. Nor not enough space to waste.

-Life is too short not to eat sugar coated cereal-once in a while. Yes my friends, I broke down and put a box of Cookie Crisps in the shopping cart... I shouldn't even say I broke down and did it because no one had to twist my arm and I felt absolutely no guilt about doing it. I guess I felt okay because the cereal wasn't green, yellow, pink, red or any other magical rainbow color.

-No matter how many times I set the boys straight about the curtains in their bedroom, someone is apt to "accidentally" pull them down again. The blinds are gone because they broke those, the roller shades are gone because they ripped those, and now Noahkeems curtains, which I just put back up last month are now down again for the 2nd time in one week. I'm beyond annoyed and am seeking solutions. (Feel free to comment and/or chime in here).

Sunday, September 12, 2010

A sense of peace

I don't know why I feel I have to title my posts and hope that at the end of it, the title matches the content. Anywho, it was a great cloudy day in my little neck of the woods. I did manage to catch up on some sleep. a 3hr uber power nap. Much needed as I battle crazy insomnia at times. (Are those violin's I hear in the distance?)

I have tons of little projects running around in my brain fighting to be the first in line. But they all must take a back seat as I continue to declutter the things in my domain that are just things and taking up way to much space and energy. I have tons of books in the back of the mom mobile to be donated-tomorrow. I can also see that I will be taking at least one trip to see if I can consign some "stuff". But in the mean time- what is "mean-time" any way, I'll be in Dolly's room organizing or should I say reorganizing and packing up stuff that no longer plays a role in her little life.
I do have to pat myself on the back and give myself a little credit. I managed to prep the 10 gallon tank in the play room for fish b.k.a. filled it with H2O. This has been an ongoing project. All the school supplies are organized in the play room. But, I must also slow the back patting down and start with the head scratching. Why? Because I realized the huge cabinet that I have the supplies in- needs to house my sewing machine, craft and sewing stuff and I may move it to a different room AND the gargantuan armoire upstairs is full of my sewing stuff. Not only that, the armoire is housing China and dishes that make me happy that need to be moved to my kitchen-an idea I had years ago, and one that popped back into mind thanks to Nate Burkus.
Since the Kitchen is one of my major offices here at the Homeschool Academy, it has to not only function but, also inspire.

That being said, I most acknowledge our newest playmate, Janssen. She is clearly older than me and holds 88 weighted keys of ivory. It has been a dream come true to have her come live with us. I have been waiting for her my whole life.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Is this week one or 2?

I can't figure out if this is week 1 or 2 of our little homeschool de cul de sac. I do know that it was one full week. We had swimming, chorus, drums, piano, theatre, art, chapel, organized lunch, and soccer. Is it me or are we into the arts? It was a very busy and stressful week but, we got through it. This evening was our first "practice" with our new soccer league. I saw some familiar faces and some people from my previous soccer league. It was fun to bump into friends from other co-ops and activities thus, we now are forming new circles.

We decided not to go the Boy Scout Route and declined on Royal Rangers also- for a number of reasons. Reasons that would take too long for me to hash out right now. But, I don't think that Rocco will suffer. He's at a co-op this year, on a new soccer team, and then this Wednesday I will re-join MOPS for another season because by golly, I just need to be there and he -Rocco, will have yet another group of buddies to get acquainted with. Enough about Rocco.

I look forward to MOPS this year. Several years ago before I had Rocco I joined an awesome MOPS group-which I loved, and then when I was pregnant with Dolly I joined another great one, I even facilitated a group after she was born and now that I have Dolly and Noahkeem are 3 &5, I feel the need to be apart of MOPS again. Thankfully my church hosts a group. (The kids age out of the program when they are 6) So I have 3 more seasons of opportunity- if I want it.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Preschoolers and Computer time

I bought Dolly a couple workbooks from the Dollar Tree so she can "do" school too. We were not even 30 minutes into the school day and she kept saying, "What me do next? What me do next?" Cookie was nice enough to read the directions for her-even though I explained them to her a little under a million times. Later during the day she said, "Me not get computer time" When will I get puter time, PBS Kids,". "Please me do PBS Kids now".

I looked at Dolly and said to her , "I think you had computer time already. Didn't you do Curious George?" In reply she said, "Me not love him". She then repeated herself slowly- just in case I wasn't getting the point, "P...B...S...Kids". Is it me or did she want some more computer time?

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Thank God for George Williams.

I have been a SAHM for 10 years now-an entire decade. Over the last 10 years I must admit/confess my breaks, down time, me time , decompression time, whatever you want to call it has never been consistent. I can't stress enough to mothers at home how very important it is to find some kind of refreshment. It's hard to pour out your life from an empty pitcher.

Some women get manicures every 2 weeks, go to the hair salon on the regular, have girl's night out once a week, go on mini vacay's with their girlfriends, join a book club, take a class, pray, nap.. but they do something for sanity, refreshment, a little break, a little regroup time so that they may be recharged to give back to those they love them most.

Let me tell you what happens when that is absent. The mother is a crab, she is unhappy, she is angry and depressed. She is wilted and in desperate need of water but the demands of life offer nothing to quench her thirst and her life rapidly becomes dehydrated. Despite her need to be re hydrated life keeps sucking her dry. I can always tell when I am not balanced. I can always tell when my spirit is dry. Over the years, I have learned that #1 People will take from you far more than they give back, #2 No one cares whether or not you are refreshed. #3 No one cares about how much you may or may not need a break- unless they are invested in you and they are concerned about your growth as a mother or woman. #4 Kids need a mother not a martyr who sacrifices for every one at the cost of her health, spiritual, mental and emotional being. #5 Kids don't need a martyr who is constantly on the altar of self denial in order to please those around her and it is clear that no one sacrifices themselves for her well being or happiness and thus she withers.

So, this year-this school year I am once again presented with the opportunity to engage in new relationships, cultivate some old and build up my Relaxation Stations in which I can recharge who I am. Which brings me to what I am thankful for today. A man named George Williams. A man who had no clue that I would, many years later after his death utilize what he planted, what he created from a need that arose in his own life. Because he created a space for men of his generation to pray and reflect and to enjoy athletics, it has afforded me the opportunity to decompress, connect, laugh, get energized and focus on my goals all the while having someone care for my children. I am so thankful for this outlet and the man who saw his vision come to past. A man who had no idea that in 2010 a stay at home diva like myself would be participating in programs in an organization he founded so many years ago. George Williams my friends, was the founder of the YMCA. Seek out your places of peace and solitude today.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Counting my blessings; waiting for the storm

A couple of weeks ago the fam and I were traveling back from the Outerbanks of N.C. Before leaving we stopped for Din Din. We all got these amazing burgers-except for Noahkeem who thrives on Chicken and Fries. Prior to us paying our tab, and 10 minutes prior to closing, we were eyeballing these amazing cinnamon buns they were at least 3 inches high by 4 wide. We told the woman behind the counter that we would take one. Would you believe that she said "I'll tell you what, I'll just give you these. We are closing and we are going to throw them out anyway, they were baked this morning". She then got 4 large take out boxes and took the tray off buns and put them in the boxes. The buns were so huge that she had to gently smash the covers shut. As I walked out of the restaurant, I thought to myself , this is just another way that God shows his self faithful. He did say if we gave "it" would be given unto us. I reminded the kids that this was an example of God blessing us. (we often have conversations of how God will reward us in relation to how we have blessed others, and of course my chickadees want to know, how, when, and where God will bless). As I went down the stairs and to the mom mobile, aka minivan, I thanked the Lord under my breath.

Yet hurricane Earl is threatening to tear through the OBX (Outerbanks). If there is ever a hurricane watch, that area is usually it hard. So my pray this afternoon is that the hurricane would change its course and go back out to sea, that our dear friends and family would be protect all the way up and down the east coast, that God's hand of protection would be on our dwelling place and that high winds and rains would not adversely affect us. And now I go and wait.

Monday, August 30, 2010

"Look at me! No Wheels!"

Today was a very special day. Big D took Noahkeem's training wheels off of his bicycle. I thought that he would be wobbly without them and would have no clue how to stop safely. Much to my surprise, my little Noahkeem took off down the cul-de-sac as if he were Tony Hawk himself. He rode so nicely-and fast I might add. My heart just melted. Just to think this little guy was my smallest baby (5lbs, 11oz), and there he was just riding and riding down the street as if he had never had training wheels before. As I stood there in admiration, my little boy did not seem so little anymore.

And the Purge goes on

Homeschooling affords you the wonderful opportunity to accumulate tons of paper. I can safely say that we have probably housed one small forest in the form of school papers over the last 7 years. (Have I been homeschooling that long? Wow!)

I rarely work on Sundays but yesterday afternoon for whatever reason I thought it would be a good idea to re organize the previously organized shelf in the hallway. The bottom shelf had tons of what I like to call archivals aka portfolios waiting to happen. So what I did was begin the sort and purge process. I made a pile of books that I probably would not use-ever and I pile of old papers that needed a new home in a landfill somewhere. To make a long story short I managed to overstuff a 13 gallon kitchen garbage bag with papers, had Dolly and Noahkeem shred a number of unnecessaries for me and managed to find a CD that someone burned for Cookie about 6 years ago.

I was certain that I would find an unspent dollar bill mixed in with the archives but, no such luck; and so, the purge goes on.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Surprised "it" happened?

I don't think that Freedom of Speech means say the first thing that comes to your mind. Yet in this country that's what we do I guess. And whatever is in the heart comes out one way or another in some form or another. At this point in life, little surprises me. I am not surprised by the possibility that "it"- whatever "it" is at the time could happen. So when I read Sarah Palin's Tweet was I shocked? I admit I did a double take. Am I surprised? Not at all. I'm done.

Friday, August 27, 2010

The "N" word?

Of course I have to comment on Dr. Laura's attention in the media as of late. First I have to say I have enjoyed her books "In praise of Stay at Home Moms" and "The proper care and feeding of Husbands". I have been a long time listener of her talk show yet missed the broadcast when she let her colors show.

I read the transcript of the conversation. Been to her blog to see her side of things and all I have to say is this: The woman who was calling into the show was looking for advise about her in laws in respect to their insensitivity about her skin color. (She married a white man, she is black). Apparently the in laws throw around the "N" word amongst other things. She was calling for advise on what to do. Dr. Laura then went on and on about how when black people say the "N" word, it's fine (which I disagree and I am black and in an interracial relationship) but, when white people say it it's not. Then she made it a point of saying over and over during the conversation. I'm sure this was good for her ratings. The bottom line is, it's hard to advise on certain things when you have no clue about them.. If no one has ever called you a Nigger, or if a police officer never followed you for no apparent reason except that you were driving a Mercedes, you are black and not in your part of town, or if store personnel have never asked you not to try on their clothes because well, your black, then you sure as heck have no clue how to advise about the ignorance and blatant disrespect of this chicks in-laws. (and Yes all of the above incidents have happened to me).

It is never okay for blacks to call each other Nigger, Nigga , Nig or the like. I resent people that think so. And to think that all black people think that its okay to do so is stupid on the part of the person making the accusation.

To tell the girl she should not have married into a white family if she didn't want the flack is like telling a quadriplegic that they should not have gotten married to an able bodied person if she didn't want the in laws calling her gimp. Get real!!! Her comments and the way she handled the call was lets face it, blatantly racially insensitive. I know plenty of people who don't agree with interracial marriage but, that's the culture we live in. People marry outside of their race everyday.
I don't consider myself a pessimist but, I do not believe that their will come a day when any one people will stop saying Nigger or calling someone a Nigger or getting angry to the point where it just "slips" out. And as much as people both black and white would love to think that racism does not exist because we have a bi-racial president in office who is married to a black woman, they're mistaken. It does exist. It's felt more in different parts of the country and felt less in others. It's felt more in some families and less in others. Some because of the color of their skin never feel it- to them its so far removed and virtually does not exist because it does not touch their world and probably never will.

Decluttering the stuff

Given that everyone wants their own "puter" time, It's been hard for me -once again to keep up with my posts. Although I did find myself shopping the aisles of itunes for a long time yesterday.

I have been throwing out tons of papers and getting rid of things not pertinent to my life and let me tell you, the more I get rid of, the more I see to get rid of.

The biggest thing to declutter are erroneous mindsets that have become such a part of life that it appears as that is the only way to go. As children we are taught not to question authority but, why not? I only assume it's because as adults we don't always have the answers and don't always know why we believe what we believe and will consider it grave disrespect if a child asks "why" in respect to our belief system. So what do we do with all this mind clutter? It has to be disassembled, cell at a time.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

I'm back and and already busy.

After about 1 year , I finally have my own computer. Yipee!!!! So now I can make more of my confessions public. Its only been a whopping 4 days with my new computer who I have named Providence- only because that is the name of the store where she was created and I'm still getting used to having a new little piece of technology at my fingertips. Since her arrival, my crew has spent more time with her than I have. Already I have had to shut her down and make the dreaded announcement that no one ever wants to hear: "NO COMPUTER TIME!" But that's life. There are always consequences for something or another.

I am proud to say we have got all of our school shopping done. The bulk of it was done at I spent the last 48 hours filling out forms for 3 out of the 4 rising scholars that I home educate. Registration forms for various sports, enrichment programs, and activities, medical release forms, mailing list forms, commitment forms, volunteer forms, envelopes, checks all the while planning Big D's big Gigantic Milestone Birthday surprise.

Noahkeem starts Kindergarten and he is excited to learn how to read and the to learn the ins and outs of math. I guess I must have had some kind of overwhelmed look on my face the other day because he looked at me and said, "I'll come to homeschool every day Mommy. I'll come to school everyday". The uniqueness of schooling at home is that you rarely can skip class unless you're sick or the administrators take a day off. I guess you could be creative and hide when it's school time or go outside and ride your bike down the street while you're being summons to the school room/area/table.

With all the stuff that will be going on this school year, I will not just be living at home I will also be living in the car, carting everybody all over the city to their different activities. I guess it would make sense for me to keep a cooler in the car complete with granola bars, fruit, and bottled water so that I can keep up my energy level for all the transporting I will be doing. In addition to keeping my gym back packed, I guess it would make sense for me to pack my neck pillow and the current book I'm reading given all the time I'll be in the car. After all I will need something to do after I'm done snacking. Oh! I can't forget the DVD player! I can catch up on movies that I didn't see in the theatre that have gone to DVD before I had a chance to plan a date night. I can feel the business of the season already around the corner, waiting to embrace me and then let me go at the end of June 2011. But I'm okay with that. I have my planner on my desk-somewhere, where I am "planning out"(in pencil) the school year, holidays and scheduled breaks and timeouts- for me to refresh and rejuvenate.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Rocco turns 7

Yesterday we celebrated Rococo's birthday. It's so hard to believe that my baby is now 7... He's such a low maintenance boy. All he wanted to do was go to the YMCA and Swim, go to a deli and get sandwiches, play golf, and ride his bike.

Since I was a cake decorator in my life pre-kids, I asked my Rock what kind of cake he wanted for his birthday... He told me that he didn't want a cake. He wanted Jello Jigglers. How easy is that? So I made strawberry & orange jigglers. Half of the jigglers were in the shape of number 7 and the rest were an assortment of dinosaurs courtesy of a set of cookie cutters Mil gave us last year. What a wonderful day! I was so proud to make this day centered around honoring a boy who is kind, tender, active, energetic, talented and just a blessing to be around... (No I didn't say perfect-nevertheless a blessing).

He was so cute yesterday, I came downstairs after 7am and he was sitting at the table in the kitchen with streamers draped above his head and a table decorated with a festive tablecloth and birthday gifts. He was just sitting there. Looking at his presents and waiting for us to come downstairs so he could open them. I usually stretch the gifts throughout the day. I gather the ones that relatives send and the ones we bought and give a few during breakfast, a couple at lunch then the last few at dinner. Which dinner usually consisted of Cake, Ice cream, and sometimes chips. But since Rocco wanted Jello Jigglers, we had dinner and served up the jigglers and hour later.

I am so blessed to be a mother. I am honored that God saw fit that I was the one to raise Rocco. I am so blessed to have a son that will carry on our family name. I am so blessed to have a son who finds joy in the simple things in life.

Monday, June 14, 2010

Where has the time gone?

Summer is not even here and it is hot,hot hot... but, I tolerate heat more than the cold. The school year is winding down. Cookie is in the middle of testing, I'm going through test prep with Rocco and Noahkeem has officially started Kindergarten Math-yesterday-- before church. The kid is so eager to learn I figured I would do as much K math with him this summer as he wanted and go through the "How to Teach your child to read in 100 easy Lessons"- Not because I'm down with summer school but why put water on his campfire?

In my cyber absence I have learned several huge lessons and yes I will list them for those that like lists and bullets.
Lessons I learned while missing in action
  • Do unto others as you would have them to do unto you.
  • Forgiveness is a big deal that is made possible with help from the Holy Spirit.
  • Don't stare at the guy who drives down the busy intersection with a flat front tire, no matter how much noise his car makes. He knows his tire is flat-so does everyone else. He clearly has to get some where. Maybe even to the garage to change that flat tire.
  • Jesus loved and cared for people whether or not they said Thank You.
  • If you are not sure you "need" more stuff- go with out.
  • It's always okay for adults to ignore the phone while your playing on the floor. Chances are by the time you get up, trip over toys and run to the phone, it would have stopped ringing anyway or it will be a telemarketer.

Saturday, March 20, 2010

It's a busy life

Once again I am playing blogland catch up. So here are the stats.

1. We loss a close family friend a few weeks ago. We loss one just 3 months prior...Loss sucks and Grief rears its head at the most inopportune time. The reality that these people, one in her 70s, one in his 30s, are not coming back saddens me.
2. Teaching is taking up a whole lot of my time.
3. I don't want any more little people to ask me to wipe them more than once an hour.
4. The blog that I wanted to post had to take a back seat because, Life and grief took over.
5. Just because I have chosen to stay at home and raise and teach my children does not mean that I am not capable of carrying on a conversation that does not revolve around children.
6. March Madness should be declared a national holiday.

On a funny note, Noahkeem asked me today, "Mom, are you from the Bible?" I said,"No", and thought to myself, "Do I look that old?"

Friday, March 5, 2010

new post in progress

There is a new post in progress,that is still being edited. And right now, its time for the roll call.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Isn't love a funny thing?

Women love a good love story... I am fond of author Nicholas Sparks-especially, The Notebook and The Choice. Besides the fact that his beloved stories are often set in North Carolina, they are easy, comfortable reads. As I been on my reading quest this year, I found something so interesting in Genesis 29.It popped out at me, and then, I couldn't stop thinking of it. First I must say a man named Jacob tricked his father and got his fathers blessing that rightfully belonged to his brother Essau. His mother made sure of it. She obviously loved him more than she loved Essau. Jacob falls in love with a beautiful girl named Rachel and wants to marry her. Rachel's father Laban then tricks Jacob and gives him Leah instead of Rachel as a wife. (It was customary in their country that the first born daughter is married first) and Jacob doesn't realized that he's been hoodwinked until the day after the wedding. (Whatever you sew, you reap). Laban gives him Rachel a week later but he has to work for Laban another 7 years, for her. And then what jumped out at me was that God saw that Leah was unloved and gave her children. (Amazing proof that God's heart aches when ours does and he rushes in with healing). Beautiful Rachel on the other hand was infertile. With each birth of her children Leah hoped that her husband would love her. She kept saying, now I have given him a son, now my husband will love me..But he didn't, he still did not love her. He still did not think she was beautiful (although he had no problem sleeping with her). Having his children did not make him love her. With the birth of her 4th son, she said, This time I will praise God. And after that, she had no more children. It seems to me after she found contentment in her creator and stopped striving, she found the love that she was looking for. A love story of sorts full of deceit, heartache, jealousy, birth, and bondage to a father in law who prospered from the labor of his son in law. A true story based on facts! Who knew the Bible could be so juicy?

Thursday, January 28, 2010


1. My Computer died Fall 2009
2. Im still recovering from its death.
3. 2010 has been filled with me taking everybody everywhere every week.
Mondays-Rocco basketball
Tuesday-Cookie Dance
Wednesday-Noahkeem Story Time
Wednesday Cookie Music Class
Thursday Cookie to Enrichment Classes
Thursday Pick cooke up 4 hours later
4. Spend rest of the week looking for my Twin to split the driving.
5. Reading the Word-like my life depends on it (because it does)
6. Teach, Plan,Cook, Clean, Laundry, and a myriad of other things outside of my job description.